A Rising Tide Of Dumb

On a business note, I had a fantastic time at MonsterCon. Good on the Comic MonStore for giving my hometown it’s first real convention. It brought a tear to the eye of the little boy geek inside me. But before I go getting all sentimental and shit, there’s a pressing issue I’d like to use this blog to address:

The stupidity of kids today.

Now, before I’m accused of being a curmudgeon, let me clarify something: I am NOT that old. Old enough, as my mother would say, to know better, but really no older. And I’m not that smart. Brighter than the average rental car customer perhaps, but that’s about it. Something, however, has happened to the relative intelligence level of the generation immediately behind mine. Some great unknown has apparently injected the brains of the post-Reagan Baby generation with crippling degrees of ignorance. At first, I thought it was just me, but others have noticed.

Retards

To help illustrate this point, I’ve included selected segments from an interview conducted via instant message between myself and a person that we’ll call “B”. B is a 31 year old librarian at a mid-sized college-level educational institution which shall remain nameless. As someone whose job it is to help students of varying levels of experience with the difficulties of freshman-entry papers, B is well aware the depth to which this epidemic stupidity is plunging. In the interest of illuminating this, I asked B the following questions:

SnakePreacher (4:14:27 PM): First question: Many of our generation have noticed a rapidly diminishing intelligence quotient in those younger than us. When did you FIRST become aware of the fact that kids are stupid?

B(4:24:37 PM): I don’t think it’s all kids. But the majority of the college students I deal with daily don’t have a solid foothold when it comes to education. They don’t know things they should have learned in elementary school.

B(4:24:41 PM): And they’re rude, inconsiderate bastards who need to turn off their goddamn cellphones when they’re in the library.

SnakePreacher (4:25:16 PM): So you’re saying the stupidity, where it exists, doesn’t just extend to educational shortcomings, but to common knowledge as well?

B (4:28:12 PM): You mean among college students or the general population?

SnakePreacher (4:29:30 PM): We’ll stick to college students, since that’s your general area of expertise.

B (4:29:57 PM): Common knowledge and common courtesy. Yes.

SnakePreacher (4:30:38 PM): I see. Have you been able to narrow down a specific moment of birth for these individuals? I mean, is it everyone born after 1984, or ’87? Or does it just vary?

B (4:31:35 PM): I haven’t actually tried to narrow it down to birth date, to be honest.

SnakePreacher (4:32:11 PM): Well, how old is the average dipshi… er, I mean, student that you deal with?

B (4:33:54 PM): The majority that come to me are freshman, about 18-19. But it ranges to all college aged students. I have seniors who are working on their senior papers not know what a periodical was.

SnakePreacher (4:35:50 PM): Hmm… so the stupidity seems to have risen somewhere between the second Reagan and Bush Sr. administrations. Interesting corollary. Let me ask you this: What’s the flat-out most stupid question you’ve ever gotten from a student?

B (4:38:37 PM): “I’ve heard librarians make more than doctors. Is that true?” Although that shouldn’t count, because he said that as a joke.

B (4:38:55 PM): Stupid question? Let’s see…

B (4:39:21 PM): “Can you write my professor a note saying I couldn’t find any research on my topic?”

B (4:39:24 PM): That made me laugh.

SnakePreacher (4:40:17 PM): I’d beg you to tell me that’s a joke, but I know you well enough to know it’s not.

B (4:41:20 PM): True story.

SnakePreacher (4:41:37 PM): One last question, then.

SnakePreacher (4:42:08 PM): Just for speculatory purposes, what do you think might be the cause of this rising wave of moronity?

B (4:44:34 PM): A lowering of collective standards. An acceptance of mediocrity. No Child Left Behind, which places a greater emphasis on what to learn for the test, but not enough on how to think. Mental laziness as a society. Poor leadership in education….

B (4:44:39 PM): I don’t know. It’s a pretty long list.

SnakePreacher (4:45:59 PM): So like all great shipwrecks, a conjunction of several elements, from lost binoculars to crappy steel.

SnakePreacher (4:46:05 PM): Interesting. Well, thanks for your time.


B (4:46:48 PM): No problem. And stop looking at porn in the library. I know it’s you.

So there you have it. One brave woman’s view of a complete collapse of anything resembling intellectual prowess in our younger generations. You could call it a view from the front lines, or just another incredibly depressing piece of observation. Either way, flippancy aside, consider this for extra chills down the spine:

These people are now allowed to vote.

Out for now…

– Rev

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1 Comment

  1. *GASP* I know who “B” is! How much will you pay me to keep my filthy secrets?


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